A Long Road Home...

(Sorry in advance for this long post!)


So, we thought that we were home on Monday for good... but unfortunately thought wrong.

When we were released from the hospital at the beginning of the week, Casey had jaundice and an appointment for a visiting nurse to come out on Tuesday. Amy, the nurse, was wonderful and spent a nice amount of time with us. Before she left, she took some blood from Casey to have the bilirubin levels checked.

We received a call within a couple of hours that Casey's level was up higher than when we left Virtua on Monday, so a durable medical equipment company delivered a "wallaby" to us about an hour or two later. The wallaby is (instead of a cute marsupial) a little "bili belly blanket" that we needed to wrap about Casey's stomach and keep her hooked to for at least 23.5 hours a day. (WOW!) This was only a little bump in our road, but an overwhelming experience for a hormonal mommy. (Though it was cute to see our baby look like a glow worm.)

Within two hours, Casey was ready to eat, and I was stressed to be feeding her while she had a heavy tube hanging out of her clothes and a radioactive-ish beam about her. Before Tee Jay even got the baby fully handed over to me, she had her first ever big spit up... and it was all brown with a little stringy amount of red blood.

We called the pediatrician immediately, who felt that it was probably just some old blood Casey had gotten from one of my ducts. But, if we were worried about it (and what possibly could be going on in her belly), we could head to the E.R.

We decided to drive back to the hospital, and though the E.R. staff was nice enough to get Casey out of the way of the general public, that meant we were spirited into a hot little "triage room" that worked more like a messy supply closet for folks to constantly poke in and out of for defibrillators and the like. Because of her jaundice, Casey was becoming more and more lethargic, and I was unable to properly feed her for hours of waiting for a pediatrician to see us (immodestly expressing myself into a styrofoam cup). Tee Jay and I hadn't eaten since 2:00PM that day, I hadn't brought my medications to the hospital with me, and we were becoming more and more cranky, just like our daughter.

By around midnight, Tee Jay had finally coerced a pedi nurse to begin our E.R. process, and she came in with another RN to take a heel prick and figure out the most recent bilirubin level. When they said, "We'll just put her on Mom's lap to get this done," I sort of began to black out and whispered, "I think I'm going to faint..." and was moved to a stretcher in the hallway. I was shaking, pale white, and personally feeling that I was in an emotional and physical hell.

What my husband was going through, I will never know. He now had a sick baby in an E.R. supply closet, a sick wife in the hallway, and I'm sure a helpless pit in his empty stomach.

The hospital was totally full, and because there was no room for us in the pediatric ward, the E.R. nurse finally took pity on poor Tee Jay around 3:00AM and got us specially admitted back into the Mother/Baby unit that we had been released from just the day before.

Talk about a godsend... amazingly so. The Mother/Baby nurses are trained to deal with not only healthy and sick infants, but also moms who are not nursing correctly, not handling emotions well, and not feeling like they can "make it" through a newly scary and unexpected readmission to the hospital.

Over the next day, we were coddled, cared for, and cherished (we literally felt like we were Number 1 to our nurses and lactation consultant).

Casey was placed in a isolette (one of those plastic baby cribs where your hands have to go through holes to touch the baby) with phototherapy lights on her all day (except when I would nurse), and her bili levels were checked frequently. Unfortunately, our camera was not at the top of the priority list when we drove to the E.R. on Tuesday night, so we have no pictures of this part of Casey's beginning, but it was cute. She wore little sunglasses and seemed to enjoy her first ("and ONLY," says Mommy) tanning bed experience.

Emotionally, I was feeling much better at times - but also having some seriously stressful moments. In addition to our being hospitalized with Casey, the Boudreau family had suffered an absolutely unimaginable and devastating loss this week and then I received a call in the hospital on Wednesday that a coworker had also unexpectedly passed away. For this reason, the on-call doctor from my OB practice stopped into our room, and because I personally wasn't readmitted to the hospital (just Casey was), he suggested that I get out in the sunshine and walk across the street with Tee Jay to a quick post-partum appointment. Between our loving nurses, the walk (which included just taking a moment to hold my husband's hand and realize that we were going to make it), and the talk with the doctor, I was able to work some things out in my head and really begin my recovery as well.

On Wednesday night, Casey's bili level was down to an 11, and they told us that we could take away the phototherapy lights and put her in a regular crib for the night! In the morning, not only did she NOT have too high of a rebound bili, but her level actually went down again to a 10.6 - and we were free to go home!!!

Unlike Monday (where we drove Casey over the bridge to Philadelphia with some trepidation), we were THRILLED on Thursday to pack up the car seat and go.

We're home, we're happy, and we are HEALTHY. Thank God!



(Wet hair and dopey looking parents equals sheer happiness to be home!)

Photos...

I have learned an invaluable lesson over these past few days - to never judge a new mom or dad again!

Not that I would often make a habit of critiquing my friends, per se. But I remember when folks I knew would have babies, and I'd sometimes think of the new parents or new grandparents or new aunties and uncles, "Why haven't they sent any photos yet? This is their granddaughter [or insert other relation here]! Dude, people want to see this baby!!"

Can't do that anymore, because my (our) days and nights have been so consumed and time-consuming. With what? I barely know... except that I'm pretty sure feedings, nursing battles (some won and others lost), changings, tears, hormones, ups, downs, etc. may have something to do with why we have no clue what day or time it is.

So, with sincere apologies for any delay, we offer a few little hospital photos:

Introducing...

Casey Susanne Boudreau!



Well, as many of you may already know (via emails, phone calls, etc.), our daughter Casey decided to arrive before her scheduled induction date! Here are the nitty-gritty details...

I was taking a nap on our couch yesterday afternoon when I woke to a gush of water. (not Niagara Falls, but enough to get my attention.) I inspected the situation (and yes, that includes the gross idea of smelling it) and felt that this was probably anmiotic fluid indeed.

I called Tee Jay at work, who stated that he was already packing up for the day and getting on the subway, and I told him that my water may have broken and to GET HOME!

Within the next hour, I sped around the house, cleaning things, putting out fresh sheets, etc. I was having no contractions and no further trickle of fluid. Assuming that the baby's head was probably blocking the cervix (and thereby blocking any possible leak), I decided to lay back down when Tee Jay arrived home. Again, I experienced a gush of water.

We called the doctor's office, and though contractions still hadn't started, we were instructed to head to the hospital. We arrived at Virtua Memorial at approximately 8:00PM, and we didn't notify anyone except for our parents, because we really weren't sure if this was going to be the "real deal" or not.

I was hooked up to fetal monitoring and given an exam, finding that I was not dilated and that the resident doctor didn't feel my water had broken after all. However, because Casey's heartbeat was hovering around the 170 and 180 range, we would probably stay put for an hour or two to monitor it.

Tee Jay and I were peacefully watching TV the first time the nurse came in, saying, "WHAT is going on!?!?!?" and grabbing the printout of the fetal monitoring. I took a look at the screen, and saw that the heartbeat was down in the 90s! The nurse changed my position and put me on oxygen, and Casey got better at that point.

Because of the deceleration, we were told by the resident that we would stay overnight for observation and possibly go home on Saturday morning (but that Dr. Grossman, whose shift would begin Saturday, was a little more "anal retentive" than the others - so he might begin the induction a day early).

Casey had other plans... after two more decelerations, the resident arrived in the room again and placed the catheter in me to help with dilation - thus beginning our induction on Friday night! Again, we called our parents to tell them that Pitocin would be started Saturday and to start making their travel arrangements.

And then, one last time, we were in for a surprise when just moments later, around 10:30PM, the resident popped her head back in and said that our doctor on-call had been watching the monitoring from home and decided that, because I wasn't dilated at all yet, we couldn't wait through a normal labor time period. This baby was being delivered Friday night.

I asked, "I'm having a c-section? Does that come with a sedative?????"

But I calmed down over the next several minutes, knowing that we all wanted what was best for the baby. Tee Jay made final calls to the parents about the new change in plans... he scrubbed up... I received a spinal anesthetic (like an epidural, but no tube was left in my back and the medication would only last for an hour or so)...

and at 11:26PM on Friday, February 20, 2009, our girl was born. She weighed 7lbs, 4oz, and was 21.25 inches long.

It all happened so fast (we certainly hadn't expected a baby on Friday!), but the nurses (especially our L&D nurse Linda), the nurse anesthetist (Dave), and our OB Dr. Gorlitsky were wonderful. We were in good hands, we know we are in God's hands, and we are proud parents finally!

Sooner Rather Than Later...

I had a non-stress test last Thursday to ensure that everything is still going well with Miss Casey, as it was (and all of the NSTs have shown that). The doctor also did an internal exam that day and found that I was not dilated at all. Because of Casey’s two-vessel umbilical cord, he suggested that I start NSTs twice a week.

…which brings us to today. Another NST (everything was again fine with the baby) and another internal exam. The doctor seemed extremely disappointed that I still was not at all dilated, and I explained to him that I really hadn’t expected to be, because I never dilated prior to labor with E.K., and thus far in my current pregnancy, I haven’t had a single Braxton Hicks contraction.

However, the doctor was less blasé than I was – and he stated that due to the two-vessel cord, he doesn’t want me going past the due date of February 24th. Therefore, I am scheduled for an ultrasound tomorrow, an NST Wednesday, another NST Friday, and...

a foley catheter induction beginning Sunday night!

If the foley catheter (a balloon in my cervix to help dilation) puts me into active labor, great. If not, we'll begin with Pitocin sometime on Monday. From hearing about friends (and friends' friends) starting dilation with catheters, creams, or Cervidil, none have gone into active enough labor to avoid the Pitocin. But in hopeful news, my sister saw a woman on "The Baby Story" yesterday who, with the foley, went from 0- to 7-centimeters in four hours! (Fingers crossed.)

It sort of stinks that it will be a less natural labor than I was planning on (where I could labor for several hours at home, try different exercises and positions, possibly use the birthing tub in the hospital, etc.). But all in all, if it gets us a healthy daughter, we really can't complain.

The main point is, we should probably have a baby on Monday or Tuesday of next week!

Showered with Love...

Last night, I was genuinely surprised by a Valentine's Baby Shower at our friends' John and Jen's house. It was a wonderful, intimate dinner party of nine, and it was a true shock to me (who thought we were having a "the-men-make-the-dinner" evening with just the hosts of the party). Instead, when I walked up their stairs, I saw several friends who don't even know John and Jen (one of whom all the way from California)! My brain did a little back up, and I thought, "WHAT ARE THEY DOING HERE?!?!"

It was wonderful, and even though few at the table knew one another, the whole group laughed together and enjoyed the food, drinks, and company for hours.

Tee Jay and I didn't head home until 2:15AM - our bellies heavy and our hearts full of the love surrounding us. We may be far from home and our families, but we are extremely fortunate to have folks who care about us here in PA/NJ. Thank you, thank you, to everyone who celebrated us last night - and to our generous hosts (John and Jen, you've outdone yourselves once again!). We are so blessed!

A Safe Place...

We officially reached our 38 week pregnancy mark yesterday... which means that we are also officially "full term!"

Therefore, at any point between now and 4 weeks from now (though hopefully the doctors wouldn't let me go that long), if Casey arrives, she's right on time and not considered early, pre-term, etc.

Come on, Baby Girl - we're waiting!

Getting Ready...

Years ago, I started a blog as part of a computer science course I was taking at RIC. It consisted of two simple posts that really meant nothing to anyone.

But that simple college assignment set the stage for a bigger, better blog to come. When our then-newborn niece was diagnosed with Williams Syndrome and congenital heart defects, I suggested that my sister check out blogspot.com - which she did - and Clare's Journey began.

We love checking in on our NH relatives and watching our nieces and nephews grow via the "Journey" site - and therefore figured that maybe our out-of-state family members would appreciate seeing and reading about our soon-to-arrive daughter, who is due in less than 3 weeks now!

So starts our world of blogging...